Embracing the Darkness ©

"Man that is born of a woman is of few days, and full of trouble."
~Job 14:1

I want to share with you a new concept. As always, I ask that you don’t trust me at face value. I ask that you treat this as you would clothes you’re trying on at the store. If it fits, go with it. If it doesn’t, discard it. Not every concept is a perfect fit for everyone. Go with what works for you.

In this chapter I’m going to talk to you about darkness. The only thing bad about darkness, or the state thereof, is that you can’t see; at least, not outwardly. When you find yourself in a state of darkness you should use that time to find calmness and stillness and begin to live and think within yourself. By doing this, in time, you can find the very answers needed in order to be brought to the enlightenment or freedom you claim to be seeking.

Negative results stem from negative behavior, and negative behavior is a result of moving around in a state of darkness. If you find yourself in a totally darkened room, and you just run about here and there, you will likely bump into one object or another – a couch here, a table there. However, if you’re calm and still, you will take the time to navigate yourself throughout the darkness feeling around until you find the light switch to enlighten the room or the door that will lead you out of the darkness.

I call this concept “Embracing the Darkness.” You see, most people – all of us I’ll bet – were afraid of the dark when we were kids. Why? Well in our minds as children maybe it was because we thought that the Boogeyman lived in our closets or that there was a werewolf under our beds. The reality is we were more afraid of the dark. Not that our young minds could comprehend it then, but darkness is a mental metaphor for the unknown, and it is a universal human trait to fear the unknown.

As we got older, we realized that the only things living in our closets and under our beds were our clothes, toys and shoes. We even outgrew our fear of the dark, but the fear of the unknown is so deeply embedded in our human nature that it stays along for the ride for the rest of our lives. The challenge we have is conquering that fear, and believe it or not, we conquer it all the time – many times without even realizing it and other times because we have no choice but to “man-up” and face it.

I’m sure there were several times in your childhood when your mother said “Wait until your father gets home!” or felt that queasiness in your stomach when you were sitting outside of the Principal’s office – which probably led to the whole “Wait until your father gets home” thing. Even if you knew what was coming, there was still some fear, but when the moment of truth came, there was no running away from it. There was no way out of it, so you dealt with whatever happened and went on with the rest of your life. Life works in the exact same way.

It works in the exact same way because life is full of “moments of truth,” and how you come out of those "moments of truth" is based on how prepared you are to face them. Have you ever asked someone to dance? “Moment of truth.” That first kiss during or at the end of a date? “Moment of truth.” Making love for the first time?  Absolute “moment of truth.”

Now, what is the best preparation for successfully facing these moments of truth? Believing above all else in yourself and your ability to come out on top. This was how David beat Goliath. How James “Buster” Douglas beat Mike Tyson, and how Donald trump climbed out of over $900 million dollars of debt.

Speaking of Trump, in one of his books he tells a story of a time when he pointed out a homeless man to his daughter and said “that man is richer than me right now.” Why? Because he had to make back nearly a billion dollars to have the same "zero" cash flow that homeless man had. I don’t know about you, but I don’t even want to imagine what $900 million dollars worth of darkness is like, but if Trump can do that, then I figure I can at least find a way to keep the lights on and food on the table – and so can you.

Many people go through life thinking that if they just think happy thoughts, they’ll minimize the negative times in their lives. I don’t completely disagree with this line of thinking; however, more often than not, many of these “positive thinkers” are actually ignoring the possibility of negativity popping up, so when it does – because at some point it always does – it comes as a devastating surprise.

Why? Because they were so busy “thinking positive” that they never or barely stopped to think about the infamous “What if?” Remember, a minute ago I told you that facing your “moments of truth” requires preparation. What is any one of life’s given hardships if not a “moment of truth?”

Now when I use the term “embracing the darkness,” I do not mean to become one with it. I mean for you not to run from it. I mean for you to find the courage – even fake the courage if you have to – to take a hold of it and take control of it, very much the same way a wild stallion is tamed.

The cowboy gets on the horse and rides that bronco as it jumps and bucks all over the place. The cowboy might – and often does – fall off of the horse, but the first rule of horse riding is if you fall, get right back on that horse – and that’s just what the cowboy does. He rides that horse until it gets tired of bucking. The horse realizes that the cowboy is the one who is in charge and becomes tame. “Embracing the darkness” means facing and fighting your fears and seeing your negative situations for what they are – experiences that will come and eventually go.

When it comes to facing your fears, you can either be the cowboy breaking the bronco, or you can let your fear control you – and you become the bronco that gets broken. Sadly, many people go through life like herds of broken and tamed horses … broken by disappointments and tamed of that wild spirit to dream and work to see those dreams come true.

I don’t have to tell you that dark times will come. You know they’re coming because they’ve already come. Maybe you lost an account or got passed over for a promotion. The woman you saw dancing all night suddenly has a case of sore feet when you ask her to dance. The guy you thought was winking at you was actually interested in your girlfriend sitting next to you. You survived all of these things and you will survive whatever else will come.

What I want is for you to not allow your spirit to be tamed. Don’t ignore the infamous “What if?” hiding in the darkness of the unknown. Instead, charge right into it! Face the “What if?” because only when you face the “What if?” will you find the answer to it. If the “What if?” hasn’t happened yet, you will have prepared a battle plan for it, and if the “What if?” happens to be “What is,” you will develop your battle plan to fight your way out of the darkness!

Don’t be afraid of the dark! Even the bible tells us that in the beginning there was darkness. It’s nothing more than a tunnel you have to go through. You might lose radio and cell phone reception; there may be moments when you might not be able to see your hand before your face, but if you keep moving forward you will get through it and into the light!

HRJR Enterprises ™ All Rights Reserved

Becoming Better at Becoming Better ©

As human beings, we all come from the same genetic stuff. We come into this world as blank slates and empty sponges. Wherever God saw fit to drop us off on this planet, we have to make due with whatever resources we have available to us. Therefore I submit to you that if you take an infant of any given ethnicity or nationality, and raise him or her in a culture completely opposite of that infant's nationality, that infant's personality will grow and develop based upon that culture wherein which he or she was raised. So you get what you got and you rock with it!

There is no sense in wishing you were born somewhere else or wishing that you were born someone else. You are who you are, where you are; and if you're not happy with who you are and or where you are, then it's up to you to change who you are and where you are!

I can practically read most of your minds right now. Most of you are thinking "that's easier said than done!" Or "why don't you just tell me how to do it then?!" Well first off, you don't get off that easily. Changing who you are or what your condition is, is not an easy thing to do - nor is it supposed to be. If it were easy to go from "ain't got" to "got plenty," everyone would be doing it and there would be virtually no poverty in the world.

But it's only a select few who actually realize this and put it to work in their lives. As for the other side of the coin ... those who are thinking, "Why don't you just tell me how to do it then?!" I cannot tell each and every individual what he or she needs to do in each of their lives. But you see, these are the people who are looking for someone to blame when beset with the setbacks that come along the way of bettering oneself.

You want me to tell you exactly where you invest your money. You want me to tell you each and every move I made on my journey. Well that's not going to happen. It's like the old proverb "give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he'll eat for the rest of his life."

I must admit, when I first began my journey of improving myself I too wanted the answers spoon-fed to me. But the more I read; and the more and more I studied, the more I realized that I wasn't being given fish - I was being taught how to fish, and "fishing" is nothing more than implementing into your life that which you have learned. The "fish" are a metaphor indicative of the type of results you've created. Sometimes I caught big fish; sometimes I caught small fish, and other times I caught no fish and had to reevaluate my technique and actions.

So it all comes down to you! Yeah, it would be nice if someone came along and just gave you a million dollars, but since that's not likely to happen should you want that million dollars any less? Of course not ... that just doesn't make any sense. If you want that million dollars, what's stopping you from getting it yourself? The answer is ... YOU.

Repeat after me: "I WANT A MILLION DOLLARS!" Say it again ... "I WANT A MILLION DOLLARS!”... Shhhh ... Look around … Listen! Did you hear him? Who? ... The person who was saying that you can’t have a million dollars. Personally, I've know I've heard him. You might not hear him or her now but at some time in your life, you have been him - or her. The only person telling you what you are not capable of, who has enough clout for you to believe it is yourself.

There are billions of us scattered all over and across the planet; however, we are not of one consciousness. Each of us has our own individual mental space ... our own individual way of thinking. We are who and what we are based upon what we think of ourselves. We become what we want to become (or not) based upon what we think we're capable of (or not).

There is no reason why we should not have hundreds - or even thousands of Martin Luther King Jr’s., Malcolm X’s, Michael Jordan's, Muhammad Ali’s, Michael Jackson’s, Jay-Z’s, Beyoncé's, Denzel Washington’s, Oprah Winfrey's, Bill Gates, Warren Buffet’s and Donald Trump’s running around ... and not just in this country! Remember we're all made of the same stuff.

You can look at those who I have named and tell that these are people who are at the top of their games now, or were at the top of their game before they died. Dead or alive, they each are irreplaceable. Many of them had nurturing upbringings and perhaps others had to dig a little deeper, but out of all of those people I named, there was and are only one of those people and we will not likely see anyone in our lifetimes that will equal their greatness.

There were a whole lot of Baptist ministers who wanted equal rights for black people but there was only one Martin Luther King Jr. There were many ministers in the Nation of Islam in the 40’s and 50’s, there was only one Malcolm X. Out of hundreds of talented basketball players, only one Michael Jordan. In the 1980’s, there were all kinds of talk shows. Geraldo Rivera, Phil Donahue, Sally Jesse Raphael ... but the queen was Oprah Winfrey.

What makes these people the best at what they do? What makes them any better than anyone else? Those who are/were at the top of their fields are/were not there on sheer talent alone. Talent and ability can take you far; however, there are millions of people with talent and ability out there. The key ingredient that takes talent and ability to a higher level is boldness. You have got to be bold! You've got to cultivate your game and stake your claim. You've got to know that you've got the right stuff and be bold enough to convince the person on the other side of the table that they need it!

Why can't you be a success? What's stopping you? Who’s stopping you? Just like there can be only one of the individuals who were previously named, there can be only one you; and when your life’s journey comes to an end, your legacy will be defined by how you utilized the gifts with which you came into this world.

Whatever it is that you do, or whatever it is that you do not do with your life; with your skills, with the talents that God gave you ... these will be the things that will bring either joy or drama into your life. The harder you work, and the smarter you work ... these will be the things that determine how much happiness and even financial freedom you will be able to bring into your life.

There is genius in all of us. There is greatness in all of us. Each and every one of us was placed on this planet with a gift, talent or skill to contribute to make this world a better place. The challenge lies in finding what it is you want to do, finding what is you love to do, and finding what it is that you can do that will be of benefit to yourself and to others.

Next, you have to build that skill the same as you would strengthen a muscle. And like strengthening a muscle, there will be pain involved. But it's a good kind of pain. It's the kind of pain that makes you better. That makes you stronger. That makes you faster … and can even make you richer!

Watch a football game on “any given Sunday.” Those hits hurt. Watch a baseball game. I'm certain it is not a pleasant feeling to get hit by an 80-90 mph fastball; or to be running at top speed, looking up into the sky to catch a ball, and slam into a wall. It cannot be an easy thing to be 270 or 280 pounds and have to run up and down a basketball court. But in each of these sports, that's what these athletes do; and in each of these sports, there are those who rise above the rest.

There are those who start the game, and there are those who ride the bench. There are those who sit in the stands, and there are those who watch on TV at home. Wherever those people are is a barometer of how much they said yes or no to themselves. The same applies in every other aspect of life.

In just about any team, or even a group of friends or co-workers, there is one person who sets him- or herself above the rest. Diana Ross did it with the Supremes; Michael and Janet Jackson did it with their brothers & sisters; Beyonce’ Knowles did it with Destiny’s Child; and her husband, Shawn “Jay-Z” Carter did it with Damon Dash and Kareem Biggs when they started Roca-Fella Records.
At some point in time, the “Alpha” mentality rears its head, and the one who is most bitten by the bug steps up – works harder than the rest, and reaps the rewards for having done so.

What’s stopping you from becoming that person bitten by that "Alpha" bug? I cannot reiterate enough that we all are made from the same stuff. We all have greatness within us. Those of us who do not experience the happiness or sense of fulfillment we truly desire are either not adequately tapping into that greatness to achieve our desired result, or not tapping into it at all.

When I was on the football team my freshman year in high school, my job was to keep the bench from spontaneously flying off into space. I never played because I did not put forth the effort required to earn a position on the field. I put forth just enough effort to take up space on the team and that’s just what I did. However, there were other players who were getting their names in the newspaper every week because they were out there busting their tails to win.

From my sophomore year in high school throughout my freshman year in college, I was a fencer. I went from just learning the sport to being recognized as an All-State competitor on a two-time undefeated/two-time state championship team as well as an undefeated NCAA National Championship team in college. And you know what? As well as I did personally, there were others who were much better still!

In order to be or have the best you have to believe that you deserve the best. You have to then be willing to put forth the work necessary in order to earn and be worthy of being or having the best. You have to be brave enough and bold enough to step out in front and venture away from the pack.

Life is full of challenges. If you want to do and have more out of life, you will have to prove yourself worthy. If you don’t have what it takes and decide to let go of your dreams, life will let you. However, if you decide to succeed - although it will take time, and struggle, and sacrifice, if you prove yourself worthy … life will let you succeed.

I have come to learn – and I share with anyone who will listen – when you decide to step up and take a stand about setting and achieving a goal, the universe takes notice of you. Then life gets an e-mail to send Murphy’s Law a “911” page. At that point, Murphy’s Law sets out to pitch a tent in your backyard, and as you travel on your path to success, “whatever can go wrong will go wrong - and at the worst possible time!”

So when things go wrong - and they will, know that I want you to succeed "in spite of..." In spite of what exactly? Succeed in spite of anything and anyone, everything and everyone who would dare stand in your way. Don’t seek the company of people who will kiss your ass, but don’t tolerate the company of people who cannot, or worse, will not encourage you to press on during the lean and mean times.

Succeed in spite of what your family tells you. Often times your relatives will shatter your dreams under the guise of “being reasonable.” Reasonable people accept limitations – unreasonable people fight to exceed limitations. I dare you to find me a “reasonable” multi-millionaire.

Succeed in spite of what your friends tell you. The reason why you are friends in the first place is because you share common interests. Once you become “unreasonably motivated” towards your personal success, you threaten to break out of the comfort zone of your friendship. If your friends don’t have a larger vision of or for themselves, how can they share in yours?

“There is no progress without struggle. Those who profess to favor freedom and yet deprecate agitation, are men who want crops without plowing the ground, they want rain without thunder and lightning. They want the ocean without the awful roar of its many waters. This struggle may be a moral one, or it may be a physical one, and it may be both a moral and physical one, but it must be a struggle. Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never has and it never will.”

This was true over 150 years ago when Frederick Douglass said it, and I submit to you that no truer words could be spoken today.

Life is hard … So what! Succeed "in spite of." Never mind the naysayers. Frank Sinatra said it best: “The best revenge is massive success!”

WHY ARE YOU WHERE YOU ARE?

Where are you in your life right now? Are you happy where you are in your life? Are you where you want to be in your life? If you aren’t happy with whom and where you are in your life today, what exactly are you going to do about it? In case you’re not quite catching me … Yes, I am calling you out – and I am calling you out in such a way that cuts deeper than doing so publicly. I’m calling you out right here on this page. There’s no one around for you to say I’m embarrassing you; but since no one knows you better than yourself, you know now that I am calling you out before yourself. So again ... What are you gonna' do about it?

The fact of the matter is that most people are not totally happy with their lives. One thing I learned from the feedback I received from my first book “Find A Way to Make A Way!” is that as much as we’d like to think we lead individual lives, we all share the same experiences. We all have the same joys and pains and fears. These are the things that make up the human experience, and the name given to this experience is LIFE. Those who are the most fulfilled – the most successful are those who do the most to improve their lives.

Now, this is where the rubber really begins to meet the road. As I said, most people are not happy with where they are. Some of them are actively working to change their conditions. Some of them will focus on the areas that make them happy while ignoring the areas that are hard to face, and some do nothing and just accept where they are as where they were always destined to be. Respectively, I classify these people as the "emotionally" rich, middle class, and poor. Consequently, how these people tend to their "emotional" gardens equally manifests the outcomes of their material lives.

For the most part, the people I encounter either agree with me whole heartedly or disagree with me vehemently, but I am coming from a place of total honesty. Honesty with myself and the world we live in. While I am a firm believer in the value of emotional and spiritual fulfillment, neither keeps the bills paid … not directly. However, if you can find and do something that brings you both emotional and spiritual fulfillment, and an income; well then my friend, you have found life’s trifecta!

But let us return to the questions asked at the beginning. You see, only you can change your life for the better. Only you know what it will take to make you happy, and only you will know when you’ve achieved it. And all it takes to for you put yourself on that path is a little action. You have to be willing to take the first step. Once you’ve done that, the rest becomes easier.

When I first wrote this particular portion of context, it was just a couple of days after the first birthday of my youngest son, Justin. In the days leading up to his birthday, he was just crawling around looking cute and dribbling all over the place. On his birthday, my wife and I took him to get his first haircut, and surprisingly, afterwards it seemed like a brand new little personality was born! As if someone flicked on a light switch, he went from crawling to walking. First he was walking with some assistance, where as long as he had something lean on, he was on fire. Then about a week after that he stopped leaning against the walls & furniture. Now, he's running all over the place!

As you begin to take action to improve your life, you might need some assistance and that’s okay. For starters, that’s what I’m here for. As your coach, I am going to be both that wanted pat on the back and also that sometimes needed foot in the ass. As much as we need encouragement, we also need to be pushed – we need to be challenged. So again … just so that we’re clear here … I am challenging you. I am challenging you to face your fears and your flaws because until you do, you will not be totally happy. You might say that you’re happy and you might act like you’re happy; however, saying and acting happy are merely shadows of actually being happy.

Now is this to say that you have to subscribe to MY definition or standard of happiness? Absolutely not! My goal is to get you to see and acknowledge the obstacles you have been either ignoring and or avoiding; to encourage you to overcome those obstacles, and move onwards towards overcoming new ones because this is how you go about succeeding and taking your life to higher levels of greatness.

So … to answer the question, “Why are you where you are?” well, the answer is quite simple … because that is exactly where you need to be right now! If there is someplace else you’d rather be – literally or figuratively, then the onus in on you to get yourself there. If you want to shine in the spotlight of your success, then you’re going to have to get off your ass and start earning it!

HRJR Enterprises™ - All Rights Reserved.

THE VALUE OF IGNORANCE ©

One thing that really amazes me is how people function on what they think they know more so than on what they actually know. A lot of times; dare I say more than 90% of the time we learn new words by hearing them around us. We'll hear a new word on television, on the radio, overhearing someone else's conversation; or in direct conversation, and we may not know the literal definition of the word, but we get a feel for the word based on the context of the conversation.

If the word resonates with us, we will add it into our vocabulary and we will go on using it, and often without ever looking up the word. Now, a good portion of the time people get away with this, but then there are those occasional times when a person throws a word out there that they have absolutely no business using. This is a prime example of ignorance.

As a matter of fact, the word "ignorance" in and of itself is an even better example of what I am saying. One sure fire way to insult someone is to call him or her "ignorant." However, if the context in which the word is being used is factual; it's not an insult, it's a simple fact. Contrary to popular belief, "ignorance" does not mean an absence of intelligence. It means an absence of knowledge. The difference may be subtle, but then to better solidify the difference we'll have to examine the difference between intelligence and knowledge.

According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, intelligence means, "the ability to learn or understand or to deal with new or trying situations; also, the skilled use of reason." The word knowledge means "the fact or condition of knowing something with familiarity gained through experience or association." Therefore to be ignorant simply means not knowing about something ... NOT - not knowing anything.

The fact of the matter is that there are a great many things of which people are ignorant, but because they misunderstand the true meaning of the word, you will not likely come across someone who's readily willing to acknowledge their ignorance. However, this is yet another reason why so many people fail to reach new levels of success. If you do not admit or acknowledge that a problem exists, how can you go about solving or correcting it?
Something I always say is that when people make mistakes and suffer self-caused setbacks, it's basically because either they made a mistake of ignorance or they made a mistake of arrogance. When you make a mistake of ignorance, you simply didn't know any better. However, a mistake of arrogance occurs when you actually do know better than to follow a particular course of action, but act anyway. This is the cause of most people's failures in life. Just ask any convict who has accepted accountability for his or her present condition behind bars.

There is a Chinese proverb that says, "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear." The value of ignorance is in seeing it for what it is ... a lack of knowledge. Once you find yourself lacking in knowledge, you can go about filling that void and improving your life.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with acknowledging your ignorance. In fact, the acknowledgement of one's ignorance is the dawn of one's intelligence.

HRJR Enterprises ™ 2012 - All Rights Reserved.

WEALTH IS SOMETHING IN NEVER-ENDING ABUNDANCE ©

One of the most difficult things to make people understand is that there is more than enough of everything for everyone. The problem, as I see it, is that because people see something as out of reach, they think it's not theirs to have.

Actually, when people see something as out of reach, one of three things happens:
1. They reach out anyway and get what they want;
2. They reach out, don't get what they want, and never attempt to reach again.
3. They look, but never reach at all.

Those who reach out and get what they want are the ones who actually go all out to get what they want. The reaching is nothing more than putting in the required work to achieve the desired results. These people are vastly outnumbered by people in the other two categories.

Those who reach out; don't get what they want, and never attempt to reach again are the people who give up on what they're reaching for when they face any signs of adversity while they were reaching. Either no one told them that there would be rough patches along the way, or they just knew they were special enough or cute enough or connected enough to where they could just bypass those rough patches. These people feel as though they're above earning what they're yearning, which is why they never get what they want.

And then there are those who never reach at all and these people are the saddest. These are the people who have resigned themselves to accepting their circumstances because they don't believe they are supposed to have more. Their entire existence becomes one huge comfort zone.

Now if you are friends with people like this, guess what? You live inside of their comfort zone. You never asked to be there, but there you are. Now ... as long as you don't rock the boat and you just go with the flow there aren't any problems. However, if you decide that you want more out of your life, that's when all hell going to break loose because when you see yourself having more and go about doing more, that friend of yours sees less in him- or herself, and you become a threat to their comfort zone.

These are the people who believe that not everyone can be wealthy, but the fact of the matter is this ... Everyone could become wealthy if they were willing to learn and follow the rules acquire wealth. So, it's not that everyone can't become wealthy because there's not enough wealth in the world. The reality is everyone can't become wealthy because not everyone is willing to do what's required to become wealthy.

So what's required of us to become wealthy? MORE. We have to be willing to do more. How much? MORE. How much more? As much more as it takes to achieve your goal. Now, what exactly do you have to do? That depends on what you want to accomplish. The one thing I can guarantee you is that it's going to take time, and that is where people begin to lose hope.

People begin to lose hope because they're impatient, and when what they want to have doesn't come as quickly as they dreamed it would, they don't see it happening at all.
When people don't see something as possible for themselves, they don't see it as being possible for anyone. Yet and still, people all over the world become wealthy every day. You see, just because the world stops spinning for you, doesn't mean it stops spinning. You might quit, but the next person won't.

All it takes is the right idea, the right product or service, to reach the right person at the right time. You may have no control over who the right person is. You may have even less control over when the right time is, but if you've got the right idea, the right product and or the right service, you've got 40%-60% of the problem solved.

Many of the reasons why so many people do not have as much as they could have in this life are the false beliefs that:
1. There is not enough wealth in the world for them to have more of what they want;
2. They weren't born with the right last name;
3. They weren't born in the right zip code, or the people who do have more are just hoarding it all and keeping everyone else from having more.

Here's the thing. These beliefs are both 100% true and 100% crap depending on what you believe. If you believe that there's not enough wealth in the world for you to have some of it, then you will never be inspired to go after any of it. You'll just be stuck with whatever is left over.

It was Abraham Lincoln who said "Good things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle." On the other hand, if you believe that there's a million dollars somewhere out there with your name on it, all you have to do is find it. And guess what? That's going to take some work. So you see ... the reality is not that there isn't enough wealth to go around. The reality is that there are not enough people who are willing to work for it.

The "Occupy Wall Street" movement created new buzzwords like "the 99%" and the "1%." Well, for years I have said that 90% of the world's wealth is owned by 10% of the population. I'll even take it a couple steps further ... Everyone within the sound of my voice has at SOME point their lives watched television. Well, the average cast of a TV show is somewhere between 5 to 8 people.

The sheer numbers alone show that there are more people watching TV than there are people on TV, right? Yet when you turn off that TV, who has more money in the bank, the watcher or the performer? The performer. I submit to you that successful people will always be in the minority because successful people are always the ones who are willing to do more.

When you watch a play or a concert or even listen to a new CD, you're witnessing a one-time event; and if performed well, it may be a flawless performance. What you don't see are the countless hours of practice put in. Any successful person will tell you that it takes years of hard work in order to become an "overnight sensation."

In a world where the spending power of African American's - if measured as a country would place us as the world's 16 wealthiest country ... In a world where the spending power is set to be upwards of $1.1 Trillion dollars by 2015 ... I submit to you that there is more wealth in the world than we know what to do with. I submit to you that when you make the time to take the time to learn what to do with some of it, you'll soon get your piece of it. I submit to you that you can have what you want and you can be what you want ... provided you are willing to do what will be required of you.

There is more than enough wealth for all of us to have some because there will always be those who quit and give up on their dreams. As long as you provide quality value, you will get your share.

HRJR Enterprises ™ 2012 - All Rights Reserved.

Honesty in Conversation and How it Can Benefit in Conflict Resolution ©

We live in time and a society in which it appears we cannot get out of the way of our own hypocrisy. In a nutshell, people talk about creating or living in a society where there is little to no conflict, but the measures taken to create this "pseudo-utopian" society do nothing but cause conflict.

We live in a society that used to be like the famous DJ Khalid tagline: "We da best," but now it's like we're in the early stages of all those science fiction movies in which people are all dressed the same way, doing the same thing, and things like emotions & opinions are either banned or severely restricted. This country professes to be founded on principles of freedom; which in and of itself is hypocrisy because this country's wealth and power was built on the backs of slave labor... But that's a whole different talk show.

Basically ... People need to understand that there can never be total freedom for everyone. Don't believe me? How would feel about living in a world in which you can walk into a store and take whatever you want; or walk into a bank and take out however much you want; or when someone pisses you off, you can just kill them without any repercussions? Sounds good right? Well now how do you feel that every single individual in every single room, apartment, house, building and car outside of your exact location is entitled to that same kind of freedom.

Let's say it's YOUR store they take from. YOUR money they took out of the bank - and either YOU or someone you loved who got taken out ... Doesn't taste as sweet does it? I'm saying all of this to say that freedom is not free. In order for there to be freedom on the one hand, there must be restrictions on the other in order to keep the existing freedom in check and fair for everyone.

I have a problem with the way people in society are blasted for simply having and voicing their own opinion. Recently, Dan Cathy, the founder of the "Chick-Fil-A" restaurant chain was put on blast for having financially supported anti-gay organizations. How is it that people can accept him saying it's because of his Christian beliefs that he mandates HIS restaurants remain closed on Sundays, but cannot accept that he's taken this stand based on those same beliefs?

Now I'm not saying people should accept his beliefs. I'm saying they should respect his beliefs. You can respect someone's beliefs even if you disagree with the beliefs. in fact; to say it better, you don't necessarily have to respect the beliefs, but because you wanted to be treated with decency and respect, regardless of what you may believe, so it is very much possible to respect the person. But if you cannot respect either the person or the belief, simply disassociate yourself from him or her and go on living your life.

How many times have you been in or around a conversation in which someone says, "I don't want to say any names, but ...?" How many news articles have you read or watched on the news that have been prefaced with something like, "statement given by promise of anonymity?" But at the end of those statements, news articles and newscasts we're supposed to take all of what has been said as gospel truth? How can you take something as gospel truth when the person saying it can't or won't stand by what they are saying?

I understand that there are times when the truth must be told; and because of the severe nature of what that truth may be, those telling that truth must be protected - but in this day in age, hardly anyone is held accountable for what they say. So a lot of garbage gets put out there which makes life harder for everyone.

I have a simple philosophy ... I'm not going to say anything about someone behind their back that I'm not willing to say to their face. You might not like what I have to say, and conditions might be such that I might say something about someone before I say it to them, but if I said it, I'm going to stand by it. I have been in a couple situations in which someone has come to me and said, "I heard you said ..." Now if I said it, I claimed it. If what I said was misrepresented to this person or something was lost in the translation, I'd clear it up. And if I didn't say what I was accused of having said, I'd demand that my accuser and I come together and let him or her repeat what I allegedly said.

I believe that if we were to become honest in our communications with one another, we would be able to get along better. I say this knowing that although the truth hurts, once you acknowledge a certain thing you can deal with it. Now this doesn't mean people should be free to just come out of their face disrespectfully. You can be honest - and even honestly upset with someone but not be disrespectful in the process.

Here's an example, a while ago I got a phone call from my brother, Marcus, and dude went in from the gate. Apparently, he didn't care for the way I interviewed my cousin who lives in China on the last show and he had NO PROBLEM expressing just how much. Now - let's not get it twisted, while he's going off on the phone, I'm getting fired up as well. But when he was done, all I said was, "I'm sorry you weren't entertained."

What would have come out of me hitting him back with "Who the 'F' do you think you're talking to?" or "'F' you then ... Get your own show and interview whoever you want however you want?" Oh yeah ... Both of those comments were cocked, loaded and ready to be fired, but I knew that my response was emotionally defensive and would only go to show that I cared more about my own pride than what my brother believed to be constructive criticism. The fact of the matter is Marcus and I are close enough and respect one another enough to keep it real, throw it out on the table, work it out, and get past it.

If there is someone in your life that you're cool with or really close to because you grew up together or are - or were involved with one another, or you work together ... Whatever the situation is; if you have an issue with the person, let him or her know.

If you don't you're beginning the process of laying bricks. Every time that person does something to tick you off, it's another brick, and before you know it you done built a wall between you and that person and they have no idea why. And what will make matters worse is that because you spent all however much time laying down brick after brick being pissed off time after time - because you only compounding your "pissed-off'tedness" - that when everything comes to a head, you won't even remember what it was that they initially did to piss you off in the first place.

Perfect example ...

My neighbor's kid scratched my car with his bike. There was a scratch you can barely see and a scuff on the lower part of the bumper. I told him I would get an estimate and we'd talk it over. Turns out the estimate came out to over $500 because in order to fully repair it they would have had to remove the bumper.

So I go next door to see my neighbor and drop the bomb ... But I also went over with drinks in hand. His wife opens the door and gets him for me, but stays really close nearby. After he and I shared the shot I brought over, I gave him the estimate. When he saw and said how much it was, his wife came out of the other room like she was pulled by a chain. She started cussing and acting a total fool.

So I asked her what her problem was and she started cussing about the estimate being BS. SO I came back like, "That may be, but I'm not disrespecting you ... So why you gotta come at me with all the cussing?" And then THIS CHICK hits me with some crap about how I said something slick to one of her relatives when I was drunk at the last family party they had ... Like 3-4 months ago!

When I asked her why she didn't bring it up back then first she said, she didn't find out about it until a couple days later. THEN she said her husband was supposed to talk to me about it. When I asked him what was up, he was like, "I didn't want to cause any problems." So I'm like ... "Well, look at where we are now. Never mind the estimate ... You been living next door for three years, until now when have we ever had a problem?" (SILENCE) ... And I said to his wife, "How you look carrying a grudge all this time we've been waving back and forth and what-not?" How you gonna' be mad at me about something you never gave me the chance to acknowledge and apologize for? (MORE SILENCE).

See ... It's ignorant ass behavior like this that destroys friendships, relationships, businesses and families. If someone did you dirty ... Either let them know or LET IT GO. And if you know or even suspect you might have been in the wrong if someone brings a beef - or "pre-beef" to your attention, be man or woman enough to apologize for it.

HRJR Enterprises ™ 2012 - All Rights Reserved.

HRJR's 5 STAR SUCCESS PLAN ©

The great Jim Rohn was famous for saying, "Success leaves clues." If you know where to look, how to look, and what to look for the process can be easier than you think. It has always been my belief and proven experience that finding and learning the process were never what was most difficult ... It was always hardest to implement the lessons learned; but without difficulty, how could any of us possibly learn anything?

Below I share with you five steps to improve your chances of succeeding in your endeavors.

1.  DETERMINE YOUR GOAL
Success does not come like reading a fairy tale. By that, I mean it does not go in the order of "Once upon a time" leading up to "and they lived happily ever after." In real life, if you want to succeed you have to see the success and then work backwards.

Another way of "seeing the success" is to determine your goal. You must be clear about what it is that you are setting out to accomplish. Envision what your life will be like once you've accomplished your goal. Be specific. What are the sights and smells you expect to experience? How will you carry yourself around people once you've achieved your goal? How will they carry themselves around you?

What you will find is that the more you focus on these elements, the more your mind will work to seek them out to satisfy the disconnect between the perceived experience and the actual experience. By determining your goal, you begin setting yourself up for success because you have established what your success will be.

2. CREATE YOUR TEAM
One of the wealthiest men in American history, Andrew Carnegie owed the acquisition of his wealth to the team he built. He called his team "the Master Mind," which he defined as, "An alliance of two or more minds, working together in the spirit of perfect harmony, for the attainment of a definite purpose."

No one person totally succeeds on his or her own. Steve Jobs didn't create and build Apple on his own. He had a partner named Steve Wozniak. Bill Gates didn't create and build Microsoft by himself; he had a partner named Paul Allen, and Mark Zuckerberg started Facebook with three partners - Eduardo Saverin, Dustin Moskovitz and Chris Hughes. These men have changed the world, and while in each of these particular entities there may be one man's name who stands above the others; neither Apple, Microsoft nor Facebook would be what they are were it not for those lesser known team players who were there from the start.

If you are going to succeed in any given endeavor, you need to surround yourself with quality like-minded people. It's a good thing if you can create a team with friends, but that can be a dangerous game if you're not all on the same page from the start. Be careful who you approach and share your vision with. A particular friend might be good to hang with when it comes to watching a game, shooting hoops, going out dancing or shopping, but that does not mean they would be a good fit for your business or that they would even be willing to share in your vision.

In creating your team, you have to really have to define the nature of the relationships between you and the prospective members of that team. Friendships can exist within the team construct, but only for as long as everyone is working in harmony. Differences will always arise, but you have to be able to work through those differences for the benefit of the team's overall goals.

Also in creating your team, everyone has to bring something to the table. Everyone has to serve a significant and valuable function. This way, no one can be accused of just going along for the ride. You may have the overall vision, but not all of the resources to pull it off. You will need people on your team who can compensate for what you and other members lack to pull off an overall collective result.

3. DEVISE YOUR PLAN
Success does not come from having the right answers. It comes from asking the right questions. In devising your plan, you've already established what your goal is. The only riddle is getting there. Solve the riddles and you win the prize! Begin asking questions ... What is it going to take to achieve your goals? How much will it cost? Where will the money come from? What resources will you need? What resources do you have at your disposal? What resources do your team members have? What resources can they acquire? How long will it take you to achieve your goal?

These are but a few examples of the types of questions you will have to ask of yourself and your team as you begin the process of achieving your goals. Having a goal is not enough. You have to have a plan to achieve it.

4. UNIFY YOUR RESOURCES
This is why you create a team. No one person can do it on his or her own - and why should they? With everyone on the team bringing their skills to the collective, the team comes closer to achieving its goal. One person might be good with numbers; another computers; someone else might be great with people and be a great networker, and yet someone else who is good with organizing and prioritizing.

This is where steps 2 and 3 come into play and why they are so important. Everyone on the team has to bring something of value to the collective. It can be something as simple as everyone chipping in for dinner or building a multi-million dollar business. When everyone shares their resources to benefit of the common good and the common goal, everyone benefits.

You actually increase your personal power by however many people are on your team. Imagine your fight to succeed as a game of Tug of War. You can pull the rope alone or you can use the strength of four or five people to pull it.

5. TAKE ACTION
Nothing happens unless and until you take action. You can draw up all the plans and strategies you can think of. You can build a team of five people or you can recruit an army of followers; however, in order for people to "follow" you, you have to be going somewhere. And in order for you to go anywhere, you have to take action.

It is believed by many that taking action is the hardest step in this process. What's ironic about this being the last item on the list is that even though the command to "TAKE ACTION" may seem intimidating, if you've already taken steps 2, 3, & 4, you've already begun taking step 5.

It takes action to "Devise Your Plan" because you may have to do all kinds of research to validate the worth of achieving your goal. It takes action to "Create Your Team" because you now have to actually approach people, share your vision with them and hope they see the value and are willing to join your team. And it takes action to "Unify Your Resources" because when it comes time for the team members to put their talents and skills to use, that's truly when the rubber meets the road.

But that is why "Take Action" is actually listed as the last step in this process. It's the kick in your pants you need to really get started. It "takes action" to build a rocket ship or a fast car; however, once that rocket ship or car has been built what is it going to take to actually see if it works? ACTION... Someone is going to have to get in, turn the key and step on the gas. Otherwise how else are you going to know if the goal you determined is actually attainable? How else are you going to know if you have the right people on your team? How else are you going to know if your plan was on point or at some point flawed? How else are you going to know if you had enough resources ... unless you take action?

So let's sum this up...
1.  DETERMINE YOUR GOAL - What are you setting out to accomplish?
2. CREATE YOUR TEAM - Who is going to help you accomplish it?
3. DEVISE YOUR PLAN - How are you going to accomplish it?
4. UNIFY YOUR RESOURCES - What do you have at your disposal to accomplish it?
5. TAKE ACTION - Get to work.

Yes ... The plan really is just that simple. The plan is simple but the complexity comes into play in the implementation of the plan. People want simplicity, but simplicity comes at a price, and like it or not, complexity is that price. People want success, but the price to pay in succeeding is overcoming all of the obstacles that stand in your way. This plan is but a tool to help in overcoming those obstacles.

HRJR Enterprises ™ 2012 - All Rights Reserved.

BE A PART OF MY NEXT "JOURNEY!"

Has your opinion ever been taken seriously? Has your input ever been included in something greater than you? If so ... Then you know that's a wonderful feeling. If not, well we're about to change that.

A couple of years ago, one of my coaches went through the process of writing a book which is now on the shelves of every major retailer across the nation. A part of this process was to share every chapter with a select group of people, receive their feedback, and include some of their feedback in the finished product. It gave a totally new level of realism to the book, and it inspired me to do the same with my next project.

Once I have at least ten new subscribers to this blog, I will begin sharing the chapters. Please set your e-mail settings to receive notifications without them being placed in your junk or spam folders.*

In the next few days, I am going to begin sharing chapters from my next project, "SUCCESS IS A JOURNEY: From the Womb to the Tomb." If you would like to be a part of the process of completing this project, all you have to do is:

1. Subscribe to follow this blog by clicking over on the top right corner.
2. Read the chapters as they are presented, and
3. Give your feedback via e-mail to me at "HSREEDJR@gmail.com."

I'm looking forward to sharing this journey with you, and as a special thank you ... The first 5 subscribers will receive a FREE autographed complimentary copy of the book when it's officially released. Subscribers 6 through 10 will receive a 50% discount. There may be additional discounts for any subsequent subscribers depending on the amount of feedback provided.


*By submitting your feedback you consent for it to be added to the book. Furthermore, you understand that submission is at the discretion of the author and his editor(s).

Who is HRJR?

The Power & Benefit of Networking

The NEW HOME of Motiv-ACTION!

Good Morning,

I am linking my You Tube channel and blog to the same account and thus I have created a this new blog site and a new You Tube channel (http://http://www.youtube.com/HRJRVideos).

You can view my archived articles at http://www.HRJR.blogspot.com and watch many of my old videos at http://www.youtube.com/HRJREnterprises.

I am at a new place in my life and it seems only right that my new messages be brought to you from a new and fresh place. 

Buckle up ... It's gonna be a bumpy ride!